Friday 8 April 2011

A Profile of 'The Timinator' of Al Ain

This story concerning 'Tiny' Tim Smith, also known as 'The Napoleon of Al Ain', or quite simply 'The Timinator', popped into my inbox just yesterday. I offer my profound thanks to the author for this stark tale of one of HCT's legendary leeches.

Many years ago Timmy was at Academic Services pretending to be productive. He interviewed prospective employees along with two other mid level managers. If you were North American, he automatically blackballed you.

This dislike for western hemisphere teachers became blatantly obvious when he conducted a Delta course. At the first session he said ”I see some Americans here. Well, you may as well leave now, because everyone knows that Americans can’t write." The non-Americans were a little put off with this comment. At this point most North Americans left on the spot, and within weeks the rest were gone. He failed them on their initial writing assignments, so they saw the “writing” on the wall and the rest is history.

In fact, Timmy was so lazy he didn’t want to prepare any lessons, so he assigned a student each week to prepare and present a topic. After a few weeks, Timmy didn’t bother to attend, even though he was being paid to do so. The final nail in the coffin was when they had the final exam. He was the invigilator, and he fell asleep during the exam. Needless to say, there was a bit of “helping” going on among the candidates. (Shades of “Teacher, he my friend, I must to help him” here).

When the Sharjah campus opened, the college was desperate to attract teachers from around the system. Few volunteered. However, one much-loved North American gentleman did, and that was his downfall. Timmy trumped up some charges and sacked him. This gentleman had been with the HCT for several years and had an exemplary record of outstanding performance, and all his colleagues knew it was a hatchet job.

To everyone’s surprise, a replacement teacher showed up the next day. The replacement was an old friend of Timmy’s from his days in Kuwait. What a coincidence!

Now Timmy is acting director in Al Ain. How nice! When you go to dinner at the Intercontinental Hotel in Al Ain, and you order a rack of pork short ribs, don’t be surprised if pig-faced Timmy Smith shows up.

Timmy is an example of what many long-term Hong Kong residents call “FILTH” - “Failed In London, Try Hong-kong”. Except, of course, it’s easier to fool them in the UAE than in Hong Kong. But Timmy is not fooling anyone. Except himself.

Note to Timmy: “Though the mills of God grind slowly, yet they grind exceeding small.”

50 comments:

Anonymous said...

What happened about the Trish article? Did you have a moment of integrity? Never mind it'll pass soon. Just think again about those many, many grievous injustices HCT has done to the warm, compassionate and caring human being you are Steve and I am sure you can restore that tasteful sensitive little contribution of yours. Remember you have standards to live down to!

Agent Orange said...

Use your keen HCT management talent to find the article. It's still around.

BTW, the author of this blog is NOT called Steve. Your constant referring to him as such is clearly another example of your lack of skills.

Anonymous said...

Forget about "Steve" and Trish. Let's talk about Tiny Tim.

I heard he was sacked a few years ago, but then was recalled because his replacement was even more incompetent than Timmy.

Any comments on that?

Khalifa Exile said...

Yes, there must be hundreds of Tiny Tim stories out there. I urge everybody who has one to post it here.

Suede Oasis said...

Echoed by Yours Truly. Please send them to me at suede.oasis@yahoo.com

Thanks very much!!

Anonymous said...

Seems to have all gone quiet on the Tim Smith front, never mind tells us again about those beasts in HCT and their illegal withholding of your rightly won gratuities. Or did they pay up the ransom money?

Poodle Pelham said...

Yeh, SO - speak up for yourself!!

Anonymous said...

Meanwhile, at punchinthefacebook.com, Tiny Tim currently occupies a measly 8th position, Surely he's worth more punches than that!

SiJo is riding high at 4th with more than 51000 total smacks in the head, but the clear winner at present is TK - 25000 punches and 3rd place!

Way to go, guys! And let's keep 'em up there, faculty troops!!

Anonymous said...

I came across this website by chance and I am shocked !! Can I suggest you get some counselling and resolve your anger or it will really affect your health. Your comments are unbelieveable - you have so much anger. I really hope that you can one day overcome this. Everyone has had a job they don't suit , but does splashing it about on the internet really help you or make you happier? It is very selfish, spiteful and damaging to then slander other people. Tim Smith is a great guy and really supports teachers and learners. What you have written is so awful and hurtful and I hope he nevers reads it. His style is refreshing, he is a good leader and supports teachers with new ideas who are committed to education. He is very approachable, so why didn't you just have a chat with him if you had some misunderstandings, rather than slander him on the internet? It is really cowardly behaviour to blog like this. Just speak to people and resolve your issues/perceptions along the way.
HCT is a great place with wonderful people who care about students. There are hundreds of teachers who are happy and proud to work for HCT, we are just silent - getting on with our lives and enjoying our teaching. Maybe you had a personality conflict - that's life. This site is really awful- quite a sad and twisted tale of your deep unhappiness. I hope things turn around and you think back to what being a teacher is all about and the joy and rewards of making a difference to a student's life or you move on to another career that makes you happy. I am glad you left as it would be rather depressing working alongside you. I hope any other negative types move on too, it is really important that students are taught by balanced, optimistic people who enjoy their jobs. Life is too short, do yourself a favour and your co-workers - just resign. It is no big deal, the culture of an organisation is not everybody's cup of tea. I believe those who love you would also be hoping you can move on and find happiness again. Finally, how did you have time to get so angry and involved in doing this ? It is not a constructive use of time and the anger will send you to an early grave. There are courses you can do if you feel tired and burnt out as a teacher. Ongoing professional development is a great way to
to keep your mind fresh and positive. Good luck.

Ex-ADW said...

Well said!

Anonymous said...

I see that the Tim Smith Appreciation Society has swung into action - and well on time, too!

Supports teachers? Good leader? Approachable? Provide a few examples, please. And back up your other assertions and assumptions too, while you're about it, erm, ... Tim.

Anonymous said...

Why bother - while I would barely know Tim Smith from Adam, the only dirt you seem to have come up with on the blighter is some lame anecdote from about 12 years ago. This has then just been larded with the usual petty invective and insults. Despite the urging of one of your commenters (KE, April 8), no one else has seen fit to join the chorus.

Anonymous said...

C'mon Suedey-boy, things are flagging. Tell us your story again, how a devoted English teacher, dedicated his life to his students, how a man with not a single unpleasant thought in his head, was brutally and viciously dispossessed by utter beasts whose sole goal was his financial and social ruin. Never in the 21st century had such iniquity been visited upon such a humble, self-effacing paragon of education by such a devilish organisation, whose very acts have made them unworthy of human status. Then and only then, can people understand how your blog, which has only the simple, peaceful and just aim of restoring your plundered bonus, had to be. Then and only then will they understand you're not a sad chancer out to blackmail some cash but the kindliest man to walk the earth. Tell us Steve, tell us, we''ve been waiting soooo long.

Anonymous said...

When he's not impersonating Simon Jones to fake letters to editor in The National, did you know Suede's a rather fervent commenter on another blog, expatacademic. This is a site which does actually seek to critically discuss higher ed in the UAE in a sensible, mature and reasoned way (what, can this be done without poofter jokes or humiliating sex tape gags?)

A recent comment of Suede's caught my attention, if only for the egregious insincerity of what he has to say there compared to what he spews forth ON HIS OWN FUKCING SITE:

Suede Oasis on Wednesday, 20 April, 2011 at 22:29:

"Glad to see you back, EA. This place needs people like you, who can make a rational case in such a terse manner.

Some of the more rabid blogs about education in the UAE could do well to learn a little precision and decorum from you!
"

Hypocritical, two-faced tosser.

Unknown said...

So glad to get you attention and indignation! Let us know when you had the humor - and irony - bypass, Anon (above).

Regarding the wonderful Timmy Smith, let's just say there's no smoke without fire. He's not called 'The Timinator' and 'Napoleon' for nothing! Sadly, those who have suffered from his ego problem in the past are not around to tell their tale anymore.

But you're right - things are flagging a bit round here, Rudi. I'm going away for a few days shopping, but will leave the comments open for you and the other ACS sycophants to keep the wagon rolling along.

SO said...

PS: Regarding the differences in tone, I think you'll find it's called 'niche marketing'.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, but unfortunately reads more like you rue having taken the low road on your own site (again). Hard to look like you're taking the high moral ground when your busy flinging poo. Maybe time for mark III?

Poodle Pelham said...

There's no harm flinging poo when it's deserved, as long as it hits the right targets.

At HCT there are many 'managers' deserving of a dousing of excreta, so the scatalogical tone will be a permanent feature here, I suppose.

Keep it up, SO.

Anonymous said...

Where's Suede-not-paid? He must have come down from that cross by now?

Anonymous said...

Oh, I hear that Mr 'Suede No-wage' is still hanging around!

Phil Mason said...

Remember Poodle, he who flings poo ends up with fingers that smell like shit

Poodle Pelham said...

In that case there must be an aroma like God-only-knows-what at every HCT senior management meeting!

Anonymous said...

Boom tish, Poodle! While the jury's out as to whether you're a shining wit or just a whining shit, tell us - have the nasty managers paid you your hush money yet?

Suede Oasis said...

If you're referring to me, Timmy, then the answer's no - I still haven't received the money they stole from me, and neither have my colleagues who were equally ripped off.

And that means that this blog will be around for a bit longer - and your name with it!

Anonymous said...

C'mon Suede-not-laid,it's starting to flag a bit.Tell us all one more time about the many injustices you suffered at the hands of those heartless brutes. You know it's a tale that'll never tire of the telling.

Anonymous said...

Hey Suede - while we're at it, you've also been teasing us with 'forthcoming news' that 'won't disappoint' about SiJo since March, but so far have delivered precisely diddly-squat. Keep this up for much longer and everyone will be thinking you're just piss 'n wind...

Anonymous said...

Looks like Lord Limp-Dick is censoring the comments he doesn't like again. As said before, old Suede-not-laid's getting more like HCT management every day.

Anonymous said...

Well you should know, Rudi!

Anonymous said...

Suede's Theme Song

Suede, Suede, Suede,
He's not paid, paid, paid
and can't get laid, laid, laid
Don't make the grade grade

Suede Suede Suede,
Drinks loser-ade,ade ade
His future'll fade fade fade
into the shade shade shade.

to be sung to the tune of Gene Chandler's 'Duke of Earl'

Let's see if this get;s past the Censor of Limp-Dick

Anonymous said...

He's right you know Suede. You ain't getting enough. Find yourself a nice boy to hitch up with. With a regular morning milk shake, you'll find this all fading away.

Suede Oasis said...

Hoots of approval!! This is really entertaining stuff, Jed, so thanks for popping in and keeping us amused.

I would suggest 'The Ballad of John and Yoko' for your next attempt. Or perhaps the Johnny Cash classic, 'A Boy named Sue(de)'?

Anyway, it's good to see the HCT management goons showing us mere plebs just why they rose to such positions of power and influence, and ... why any sane person person should avoid HCT!

Your comments will do wonders for the HCT recruitment drive, Jed. Thanks again - you're SO precious!

Meanwhile, watch out for a revealing posting about YOU very soon!!

And that's no empty promise, I tell ya!!

Anonymous said...

You seem to be talking to imaginary friends now. The tone and temper of the recent comments seem to suggest your blog is more a source of amusement than anything else.

Reading your blog is a bit like popping into a mental institute to provoke a particularly tormented inmate.

Suede Oasis said...

Thanks for the compliments!

Anonymous said...

It seems that this blog is dead, or on lfe support at least. Nothing new, unfulfilled promises, etc...

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's all happening over at 'Punch in the Facebook', where Ged Ryan leads the list of reprobates and there are SIX HCT goons in the top 10!!

http://www.punchinthefacebook.com/punch/sharjah-hct/ged-ryan

Anonymous said...

Okay - back to reality perhaps. Would someone please explain the new e-mail from King Tubby which states "Dear all,



I am pleased to inform you of the key dates for the academic calendar 2011/12. These dates have been planned in close coordination and alignment with the academic calendars of all federal universities and the public school systems around the UAE.



HCT will resume for classes on September 4th after Eid Al Fitr. There will be a 3 week break in semester 1 from December 18th 2011 – January 5th 2012 in alignment with the schools. Our students will come back to complete the rest of their 1st semester in January.



In the 2nd semester, there will be a two week mid-semester break for students from March 25th – April 5th, 2012 which is also aligned with the break of the schools and other universities.

Okay - Let's get away from irrelevant rubbish and focus on stuff that is stupid HCT stuff like this.... Looks like faculty stay for April holidays and students have the time off.. yes, please~!!!!

Poodle Pelham said...

So, Christmas and Easter off? With time for a holiday, ... or a bit more 'professional development'?!

Anonymous said...

I think your math is a little suspect, anon (May 18, 2011 9:15 PM
above). There are now EIGHT HCT management goons in the top ten!

http://www.punchinthefacebook.com/

It looks like they'll be crowding out the rest of them soon!

Anonymous said...

We know what's happening in Al Ain Timmy!!! Started in Abu Dhabi... still continuing -- well you know what I mean the blue eyed, blond,Bs,Big,Bulg stuff. RAD!

Any comments???

Poodle Pelham said...

Please explain a little more clearly, anon (above). You've got me all intrigued, and I feel you might have a whopper story for us!

Anonymous said...

Oh well, can give you chapter and verse. Week days and nights are rather interesting indeed! Why has Timmy's appreciation team gone quiet?

Suede Oasis said...

I'm waiting for it, comrade, so make it good and juicy! I'm sure it'll make quite a splash in the rarified desert atmosphere of AL Ain!

Anonymous said...

Suede - the "revealing posting" you promised above about Ged turned out to be the shock revelation his desk is untidy and he does class observations (everybody already knows he's an asshole and a toady). The dirt you dished on the Timinator was already old news about a decade ago, yawn. And the "forthcoming news" about SiJo that you promised we "won't be disappointed" about back in March has never eventuated. Seriously man, if you're gonna run a decent hate blog, you've got to do better than this...

Suede Oasis said...

OK, I'll try better, really I will!!

Anonymous said...

Heya Shauna - what's the deal with you and Timmy!?!

Boi Timmy how are the rest?

Raja Karma said...

Surely yer not referring to Shauna the gobby blonde Scottish lezza from ADWC? And TIMMY?!

Some people are SO disgusting - they'll do anything to get their snout in the trough!!

Anonymous said...

Exactly dude! Shauna babe - thought she was discreet..

Anonymous said...

Interviewed by Tim, and I'm American. Offered a job, too.

Anonymous said...

Interviewed by Tim, and I'm American. Offered a job, too.

Anonymous said...

I got a feeling... tonight's gonna be a good night... good, good, night - ooooh! ooops!oh la la...

Rings a bell? Bella - Abela??

How about you tiny Timmy?